Walang Label

Ang hirap pag relasyon nyo ay walang label
Hindi mo alam kung dapat bang pumapel
O manahimik lang
Kase nga walang label

Walang antas ang relasyon
Walang kasiguraduhan
Laging may hangganan
At di mo alam kung may patutunguhan

Pwedeng masaktan
Pero bawal mag demand
Hindi pwedeng sabihin na layuan mo yan
Dahil nga walang karapatan

Malanding ugnayan
Malabong usapan
Bakit nakukuntento ka
Sa ganyang sistema?
Para lamang kayong gumawa ng bitag na kayo mismo ang malalaglag
Ayaw nyo bang magkaron ng karapatan?
Hindi yung tahimik kang nasasaktan

Magtanong ka
Linawin mo sa kanya
At nang maging malinaw sa inyong dalawa
Hindi yung naihirapan ka, nalilito
Hindi kaba nagsasawa sa ‘ikaw at ako’
Ayaw mo bang magkaroon nang ‘kayo’

Lakasan mo ang loob mo
At itanong mo

Ano ba tayo?

Pagsuko

Ayoko na, tama na.
Hindi ko na talaga kaya pa
Wala na talaga itong pag asa
Na maging tayo para sa isa’t isa
–
Wala naman tayong napapala
Sa mga binibitawang salita
Na nagpapakomplikado pa
Sa sitwasyon nating tila lumalamig na
–
Wag kang mag alala pagod na talaga ako
Pagod na akong magparamdam at habulin ka mahal ko
Kaya hayaan mo last na talaga to
Hinding hindi na talaga ako magpaparamdam sayo
–
Asahan mo, wala ng magchachat, text, tawag at mangungulit pa sayo
Wala ng hihingi at makikihati pa sa oras mo
Wala ng mang aaway sayo kapag di ka nagpaparamdam
–
Wala ng makikipagtalo kase kasama mo ang tropa mo
Sa kanila, kase gusto ko na sakin lang ang atensyon mo
Wag kang mag alala
Wala na, wala na talagang pag asa pa
–
Mahal kita, pero siguro nga tama na
Mahal kita pero sobrang sakit na
Kaya nakapagdesisyon na ko
Malaya kana, hindi na ko manggugulo
–
May mga bagay kasi talaga
Na sa simula lang masaya
Minsan, kailangan nating isipin
Kung may mali na tayong nagagawa sa relasyon natin
–
Sana lang, yung taong susunod na magmamahal sayo ay higit pa sa pagmamahal ko sinta
Sana lang, hindi mo pagsisihan na mahalin sya
Sana lang, maging masaya ka sa kanya
At sana lang, maging kuntento ka sa kanya
–
Nakakatawa lang isipin na sabi mo, nandito ka lang sa tabi ko
Sabi mo, mahal na mahal mo ako at hindi mo ko iiwan pangako
Nakakatawa lang din isipin, na pinanghawakan ko yung mga salitang iyon
Umasa ako na ikaw na nga sagot sa mga dasal ko kay Panginoon
–
Sabi mo, maghintay lang ako ng konting panahon bago mo ako ipakilala sa pamilya mo
Sabi mo, kung may gusto ka man baguhin sakin ay walang iba kundi ang pagkatao ko
Akala ko, ikaw na ang makakapagpabago sa pagkatao ko, mali pala
Akala ko, tayo na ang itinadhana para sa isa’t isa
–
Natuwa ako sayo kasi concern ka sakin
Kahit problemado ako, nandyan ka pa rin
May mga oras na lagi kang nag uupdate sakin kung ano mga ginagawa mo
Kung san ka pupunta, kung sino kasama mo
–
Pero isang araw, bigla ka nalang nagbago
Gusto ko lang naman sana na piliin mo ako
Pero hindi eh, hindi mo nalang pinili na maging priority ako
Mas pinili mong hindi ako papasukin sa buhay mo.
–
Nakakapagtaka, asan na yung mga pinangako mo na nandito ka lang sa tabi ko ?
Asan na yung mga pangakong walang magbabago?
Tinanong kita kung ano na ba status natin sa ngayon pero isa lang ang sagot mo sakin
Hindi mo pa kayang i handle yung relasyon natin
–
Ang bilis mong bumitaw, ang bilis mo akong pinakawalan sa puso mo sinta
Sabi mo, ayaw mo na kase pagod kana
Ayaw mo na, kase mahihirapan lang tayo sa isa’t isa
Ayaw mo na, kase naisip mo na hindi na nga siguro pa talaga kaya
–
Tinanggap ko lahat ng mga sinabi mo
Naisip ko na hindi nga talaga magtatagal ang relasyong ito
Tatanggapin ko na wala na talaga tayo
Na wala ng magiging ikaw at ako
–
Mahal, ang hirap pala maging ganito
Nais ko lang malaman mo
Hindi ko ginusto malayo ako sayo
Pero handa akong isakripisyo ang pagmamahal ko para lang sa ikatatahimik mo
–
Suko na ako, Ayoko na
Hindi na ko maniniwala pa na kaya pa ‘tong ayusin sinta
Gulong gulo ang aking isip
Sa tuwing matutulog ako’y ikaw lagi ang laman ng mga panaginip
–
Hindi na ko magpupumilit kahit mahal kita
Ayoko na magsalita pa
Ayoko nang umasa pa
Ayoko nang ipagpilitan ang sarili ko sayo kase alam kong hindi na tama pa.
–
Wag ka mag alala, pagod na din ako
Pagod na ko magparamdam sayo
Pagod na ko na isipin ka
Pagod na ako na mahalin ka
–
Pagod na ang puso kong masigla noong ikaw ay makilala ko
Pagod na akong hintayin ka
Pagod na ko kaya tama na
Wag kang mag alala, akoy pagod na talaga
–
Pagod na ko sayo
Pagod na akong umasa pang magkakaroon pa ng “Tayo”
Pagod na ko mangarap gabi gabi na sana ikaw ang katabi ko
Pagod na ko umintindi sa lahat ng oras na binabalewala mo ako
–
Ayoko na
Panahon na para ang puso ko naman ang maging masaya
Siguro nga tama na, siguro nga hindi tayo ang para sa isa’t isa
Kaya mahal, malaya ka na.

Chat Mate

Dalawang kataga
Dalawang pinagsamang salita
Dyan tayo nag simula

Chat mate na ang ibig sabihin ay ikaw
Ikaw na lagi kong ka chat
Ikaw na paborito kung kausap
Ikaw na nag papasaya sa araw ko
Ikaw na nag papasigla sa buhay ko
Ikaw na gusto kung makita, sana,
Ikaw na gusto kung mahalin
Ikaw na gusto kung mapasaakin
Ikaw na pinapangarap ko
At ikaw na kokompleto sa buhay ko

Sa chat tayo nag simula
Na dinadasal ko na sana hindi ka magsawa
Dahil ayow kung matapos ang kung anong meron tayo
Dahil gusto kung my matawag na ikaw at ako
Dinadasal ko na sana magka roon ng puwang sa puso mo
Na kahit di man ganun ka laki at least masasabi kung may parte ng ikaw na ako ang nag mamayare

Maikli lng tong tula ko
Wala na kasi akong masabi
Dahil lahat namn nasabi ko na
Ang tanong naramdaman mo ba?
Gusto ko sanang malaman kung my pagasa ba ko o wala,
Para malaman ko kung itutuloy ko paba o ititigil ko na
Di namn sa pinipresure kita
Gusto ko lng malaman ng maaga
Para di na ako aasa.

Thank You For Passing By

And maybe telling all your struggles to someone, telling them your secrets, sharing them your playlist and making them your world does not always mean forever.

Maybe they just happened because…
They’re just meant to happen.

And maybe this explains why there are shooting stars;

Shooting stars taught us that the most perfect, awaited, and brightest are sometimes, the one that we cannot have for a lifetime.

I was overwhelmed I must say.
The reason why I didn’t see you
Being out if my sight.
But beyond that allow me to say…

“Thank you for passing by.”

Behavior

People tend to be too careful with their words and actions.
Be nice, then say one bad word or do one bad move, and you’re now a bad person that quick.
Because that’s how the world works.
And that’s why, no matter how pissed I get recognizing multiple bad parts of a person, I still try to remember how that person has been good some times before that encounter.
I want this world to be a little less perfectionist but rather appreciative.
Bad parts do not define a person as bad. We have different stories to tell. You have yours, too. And by people have different stories to tell, I mean that we should listen instead of doing the talking.
In teaching a person to be good, you don’t emphasize the flaws present, because the thing is, what a person hears from other people is how she defines herself, that when you told her how her action is wrong, she has this mindset that this is who she really is.
When in fact, she is more than that.

You are more than that.

You are a beautiful black rose.
Indeed a beautiful one.

Dear You,

It’s hard to have someone like you. No matter how I tried to cheer you up and do stupid stuffs to make you happy everytime, you’ll still think of how fine would it be to die and to stop the pain that’s killing. And it pains me, too, hearing you say that. But I know you carry the greater pain so I understand you, because I know that depression is not merely a state of extreme loneliness and hopelessness, but a battle with your own darkness. There’s a part of you that demands to be alone, to mourn and to look thoughtfully onto your regrets for a long time. But I would be willing to be here when your demon smiles inside of you. I will be holding your hand when you feel like a lost soul, someone dead on the inside, roaming together with the living. I will understand you with your repeated series of depression. I will listen to every painful thoughts of how you want to end everything. It’s painful for me, too. And it’s harder to be strong when you, one of my strengths, weakens, too. I have told you millions of this universe’ beauty –down to the long dead stars that still shines brightly in the night sky. I have told you millions of this universe’ beauty to tell you that it’s worth living for. I have told you countless of times that we don’t want to lose you to tell you to please keep fighting for us who loves you.
It’s hard and it’s tiring, but you are worth it. I know that thousands of times, too, you have saved yourself from your own thoughts. I know that you try so hard to kill the sadness that killed your hope and the hopelessness that killed your willingness to live. I know that you fight your way out of the dark thoughts creeping into you. So, know that you are worth it.
When you make the slightest smile you can,
I know you are worth it.
When you make others happy amidst your own pain,
I know you are worth it.
When you are selfless enough to think of us who loves you,
I know you are worth it.
When you tell me that you want to die but having me is the closest to heaven for you,
I know you are so worth it.
I know that no right words will help you, because no matter how fine you are now, you’ll eventually feel bad some time again and again, but know that

–I’m here for you.

Someone who cares and loves you.

I Would Always Choose You

I would make you happy as long as I can. I would give all I have for you. I would always make you smile in every moment whenever you feel that you can’t. I would fill every emptiness you feel everyday you feel blue. I would color your day whenever you feel bland. I would make you a warmth coffee. I would never get tired to do all these things for you.

I would always make the best out of you in every moment you might have with me. I would make all the things I could, even you don’t choose to stay.

And by the time you decided to walk away, and left all these things behind, do not bother yourself to feel sorry for all the damage. I don’t want you to feel that walking away for yourself is such a burden for the both of us — and what I could’ve done for you is my decision, you don’t have to feel worry about you.

You came to my life, and for me, making you happy and doing all the things I could would never be called a favor. I chose it, and I would always choose to make someone happy, especially you, the one who made me feel alive again.

So if you will leave someday, don’t be afraid to walk away. I chose you, and choosing you is always my decision, and walking away to be free is you think what will make you happy even more.

The Love that Becomes Our Lost

Why does everything we love, becomes our lost?

Because we often take for granted the things we love; we often think what we love will always stay, without knowing that all the things that exist have its end.

The more we love the things, the more we loose our hold and the more we forget the things we don’t keep, they will become our lost.

Do not take for granted the love, love will never fade, but it could never always choose to stay. Hold onto it much stronger, but do not let it feel that they are not free.

If you don’t keep it, it becomes lost. And if you hold onto it, but making them feel they are free, they will always choose to stay.

Remind yourself that abandoning something is far more different than letting it to be free.

Dying Inside

I often die everyday, and most of the time when I look at the mirror, I couldn’t figure out if I am still breathing or it is just my body; functioning.

I often die in the morning, whenever I wake up. I can’t feel my entire body, but it feels ike it is attached to my bed.

I often die every afternoon, and that good thing about it is I can feel the heat that bursts through my body and burning my soul — but still, I feel dead inside.

I often die every night, when no one is around and everyone is gone. I cry a lot; nonstop until I fall asleep — and I can feel the coldness that whispering to my ear, telling that I am alone — and I couldn’t still figure out if I am still alive whenever I wake up.

Everything seems complicated, and everyone seems not to care. Maybe that’s how dead people live, no one can talk to, no one to cry on, no one.

No one visits to me everyday, no one comes to bring me flowers, no one tries to sing a song for me — no one makes me feel alive.

I often die everyday, and I can’t spill all these words out inside my head. I can’t even scream for a help, and my heart can’t speak its sobs out.

I often die but I couldn’t still figure out if I am dead or still alive, because I breathe, but I can’t smile and I can’t even cry.

Life is Simple

We do not need to complicate things. We do not need to always be loud. We do not need to be too showy. We do not need to be overly colorful. We do not need to be too elaborate. Simplicity is beauty!

Living is supposed to be enjoyed not in excess. We must enjoy life without forgetting its very basics. We can add up some spice but only for flavors; we do not add something to replace the most important thing.

Sometimes we busy ourselves with the details of living forgetting to uphold the value of life itself. Sometimes we are too focus on the designs we want to decorate our lives with that we forget to care for it first.

We are too busy making our bodies slim that sometimes we are no longer giving our bodies the nutrients needed. Sometimes we want to be good looking we have forgotten to become good persons.

We run after fame and fortune that we are setting aside important relationships, leaving behind important people. But when we are almost there we will realize that they do not matter anymore.

We seek for people’s appreciation and affirmation only to find ourselves burdened and facing too many difficulties because people can be insatiable when it comes to their expectations of us.

We desire to possess all there is that the world can offer us – gadgets, trendy fashion, glittering jewelries, expensive cars, branded clothes – that we have forgotten to live according to our own means.

We changed our lifestyle, we change our belief system, to catch up with the changes of time only to realize that we are only forcing ourselves to fit in a box that other people have designed for us.

Let us not complicate our lives. Let us be ourselves. Let us live in the happiest way we can make our lives by giving our best and not setting aside the more important things. Life is simple. Let us live simply!